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What do you do when you have a falling out with a friend whom you have known for ages ? Do you wait for time to heal? Will it ever heal? Perhaps, but the scar will always be there to remind. No matter how well a broken item is mended, the scars will show. Can I ignore the scar and proceed as if it's whole? Forgive but can I forget?

Reader Comments (6)

It all depends. You can forgive, but forgetting may be trickier. We can't really *force* ourselves to forget something, especially if it has caused great hurt.

It's true that something once broken will never be the same, whether it's a broken leg or a broken heart.

That's where God comes into the equation, I guess.

How much do you value the friendship? If you value it highly, then the only course of action - in addition to forgiving - is to choose to forget as much as you humanly can, and pray that God and the passage of time will bring peace and healing.

It's not me you're mad with, right? Okay, just kidding...
August 16, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJulian
Well, Ju, you are absolutely right. After much pondering and praying, I came up with the same conclusion.I DO value the friendship and I don't think I can brush aside a 15-year 'investment'. Working on the forgetting.
And if it's you that I am mad at, you'll know :p
August 16, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterKaty
"Memories are good reminders of what GOD has done and where we could have done better." (RZ)
It's more than just forgiving and offering an olive branch. They become the hiccups/scars of our life; they can either be part of the victory trophy of our life's journey or they can weigh heavy like an anchor. I remembered John Ortberg in one of his books wrote that the faster we learn life's lessons the faster we more forward; otherwise we will be caught in a "repeat" mode. Move on, dear. It's the right thing to do to make amends, no matter who is right or wrong. The sad thing about relationships as that it can so abruptly interrupted by something we say or don't say; do or don't do. Such scars may or may not keep us humble, we choose the pathways.
August 17, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterjonathan ng
Thanks, Jon. Yes, I am moving on. I am not much of a 'boat rocker' where relationships are concerned. So it'll be buried. Trying to forget where I buried it.
August 18, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterKaty
I agree with the easier to forget; harder to forgive =) But I have to say that even when the wound is mended, the f'ship will never be like it was before ...

Been there, done that ... =|
August 18, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterCindy
I think in my life, friendship is 1 of the thing I value the most. I may been through excatly what you may experience before with the same 'anger' you have with the particular friend or friends. Forgivenss indeed is the key to all regconcilation, without that nothing can be done. Memory will be there, healing need time to process.
August 20, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterAng

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